Ohhh Canada....Pt.1.

Yikes, don't tell me you all turned Catholic? Anyway, how are all of you? This end you ask,....Status Quo.

• Mrs. Titus:....still sick
• Grandma:....doing better and wanted to try living on her own again.
• Neck:...still fucked up. Disability rating jumped from 7% to 17%.
• Local commercial development in neighborhood:....moving ahead, maybe some of my property value will recover after all.
• The "Branch":....still sucks. Looking for a tie dyed "Barack Obama 08" shirt for casual Friday. I figure hell, why not stir up the hornets nest.
• The ex:....child support went from $400 to $1500 per month.
• Mrs. Titus:.... finally decided to move forward with a career change. She was accepted to school and will start in May.

So....Mrs. Titus and I have been discussing retirement for the last several years. As it stands, I can retire in just over nine years. Considering how my neck has deteriorated in the last three years, the reality is that I may only last another three to five. The kids are almost grown and should be on their own in two years. We have planned to look for property in the pacific North West. If we are able to unload some of our California assets in the next two years, our relocation time line may move quicker than expected. I've been in the California Bay Area my whole life. Frankly, I'm sick of it! One plan we are researching would have us relocate north of the border :>). With Mrs. Titus having a new career (and the old one to fall back on for side work) and my retirement....we should be able to live well.

More to follow....
Jake

Happy "OK" Friday

Good Friday, is the Friday preceding Easter Sunday. It commemorates the crucifixion and death of Jesus at Calvary. Apparently, that is today. I have to ask the question. What's so good about it? If your Catholic and need to recognize that date that your "saviour" was murdered, why for fucks sake would you call it "good"? I mean really shouldn't it be "not so good Friday" or "this sucks Friday"? What half witted apostle or convertee said "Hey!!!! It's Friday, the weather is great, the Romans haven't fucked with me today, and Jesus is dead. Shit two out of three ain't bad. All in all it's a pretty good Friday.

Frankly, the title is a bit out dated. Personally I think most Fridays are good. Hell, if the holidays fall right and create a three or four day weekend, then you have a good Thursday and or good Monday. Come to think of it, I was in Vegas once and had a good Wednesday. . . .but that's another story.

So before I get to far off track, here's my thought.

"Pope guy, you need to make a few changes within your organization. Name your days more accurately".

1. Don't eat meat day


2. Get a spot on your head day


3. Give up something you like week


4. Find the egg day


5. Give shit away day


6. Miss football day

Be honest, call it like it is. Once you get that done we can work on your N.M.B.L.A problem. Until then, best of luck. Excuse me, I have a rib eye to cook. . .

Jake

"Father Flannigan I can't practice today, I forgot my shorts."

Let me preface this post with "I was born into the catholic faith". Yet, I feel Catholicism is kind of a funny (not ha ha, but strange) thing. Your hear people say “I’m a practicing catholic”. What the hell does that mean? I interpret practicing as “oops I fucked up, let me try that again!”, “shit I did it again, father forgive me.” “Mother Mary full of grace please forgive me for jerkin’ off to mamasgotmelons.com, I’ll never do it again.” I mean really, most all of the Catholics I know break the friggen' rules everyday, intentionally, and without guilt (until Sunday rolls around). I guess they aren’t lying when they says it’s just PRACTICE. Queue the Allen Iverson press conference. “We’re talking about practice!” Sorry, I digress. Shouldn't they be saying “I’m Catholic and I’m on my game?"Shit, I don’t know where the hell I’m going with this! I’ve read two recent posts on other blogs that bring up lent.

http://exeverything.blogspot.com/2008/02/hast-thou-not-poured-me-out-as-milk-and.html

http://sassyblondie.blogspot.com/2008/02/givin-it-up.html

Since I don’t practice Catholicism and don’t consider myself to be in the “game”, I can’t really relate to the rules/traditions of it all and this “giving up” stuff. But, for the sake of this post and the spirit of lent, I will make the following promise to "give up".

I promise to give up the following habits while sitting in church.

1. Smoking a Cohiba.
2. Drinking Patron straight from the bottle. Even though mixing it is a sin!
3. Reading Dan Brown books.
4. Visiting mamasgotmelons.com on my iphone.
5. Singing a hymns that starts with "duck duck bo buck banana fanna foe. . . ."
6. Asking people next to me if catholic girls are really that bad.

But only for forty days. . . . . . . .
Jake