Wednesday, February 13, 2008

"Hey baby, want to see my tattoo?"

This is the time of year that I hate. That gap between football and baseball season. The sports "Blackhole". Lately; to pass time, I've been searching the web for inspiration for my next tattoo. I can usually find some great ideas to help the artist I use, create what I want. That's when I came across this guy. What the fuck was he thinking? Or maybe that was the problem, he wasn't thinking.

Guy: Chicks really dig tattoos. I think I'll get one. But what should I get? I'll go ask the tattoo guy down town.

So I picture this guy hopping into his 72 Dodge Dart and heading to the shop. He walks throught the door. *ding* *ding*

Tattoo Guy: Hi, welcome to the Hip Hop Tattoo Shop, can I help you?
Guy: Yeah, I hear chicks really dig guys with tattoos, but I don't know what to get.
Tattoo Guy: Look man, maybe you should put a little more thought into this, I mean it's a pretty big commitment.
Guy: Look, I'm really striking out with the babes and I don't know why. I'm sure a tattoo will change my luck.
Tattoo Guy: Hey whatever man it's you body.
Guy: Well what should I get?
Tattoo Guy: Look, how the fuck should I know? It's your tattoo.
Guy: Come on man you do this all the time, help me out.
Tattoo Guy: O.K. how about a cool skull and dagger.
Guy: Nah skulls kinda scare me. I still live with my mom and she won't let me keep a night lite on. She says it runs up the PG&E bill.
Tattoo Guy: Well then how about a "Mom" tattoo?
Guy: Shit man do you think I'm some kinda loser or something?
Tattoo Guy: Look dude I ain't got time for this. . . for all I care you can get your cat's ass tattoo'd on that fat stomach of yours!!!!
Guy: Woooooooo, now your onto something. . . . . that idea rocks!!!!!

Way to go dude!

Jake

4 Beer Farts:

Mr. Fabulous said...

I sent you that picture in confidence, dude.

Pitchers and catchers report today, baby!

Jake Titus said...

Then you shouldn't have made it your christmas card picture. Thank god, because hockey/basketball ain't cutting' it!

Tyler Durden said...

Nothing like a three dimensional picture of a cat's asshole right on your belly. I guess these are the type of guys that wear wife beaters at the pool huh...

Jake Titus said...

Yeah, and jeans at the beach. Call the cops if you see that freak within 100 yards of a school and he's got a set of binoculars!!!!