Thursday, April 17, 2008

Running around like a chicken with my. . .

Wow, what a week. So this teaching thing has me running around crazy. It seems that my twenty-ish years of experience are in demand. I have an interview with one of the local community colleges next week. The primary instructors heard of my interest and are prodding the head of the department to pick me up asap. So, I have spent the week tracking down past certificates, transcripts, and licenses. Today I spent a good three hours putting together a new resume'. I forgot what a bitch it can be to format a Word Document. So it appears that while in my current state of chaos, the world has continued to move along without me.

Here are some of the things that I did not have the time to comment on.

Olympic Protesters:
I get it. I agree. It's not going to work. China; like most first world economy's, is fueled by money. Stop the shouting and just quit buying crap from them. No more Yo-Yos, disposable bamboo chop sticks, or glow in the dark titty lighters. Better yet, boycott WalMart.

Obama and the comment:
Face it "those people" also don't have a sense of humor.

Gas prices: I have a hybrid and I'm still spending 40+ bucks a week. WTF!!!!

Car Horns: People!!!! Your car horn was not designed to tell your friends that your out in front of their house. Get your lazy fucking ass out of the car and knock on the door.

Food prices: Again, WTF!!!! When I was a kid the average full shopping cart was about $50. The last three trips I took to the grocery store a full cart is averaging $225. AAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Chad Johnson: Cincinnati doesn't deserve you. Come to Chicago. We'll take good care of you.

Taxes: First of all let me point out that the Alternative Minimum Tax fucked me AGAIN!!! Tax day just passed. That evening I had a chance to watch a bit of the nightly news. Why the fuck do people wait until the very last possible minute to drop their shit in the mail? I guarantee those same slow fuckers are probably pacing like a caged lion waiting for their economic stimulus check! I hope Uncle Sam waits until the last god damn minute to send there shit back to them!!!

The Popes Red Shoes: Lets put it this way. He knows a lot of Broadway show tunes as well.

11 Beer Farts:

The Middle Lifer said...

Sense of humor? Gee, the whole country must have some sense of humor, we got GW as president still!

The Ex said...

I thought 'taxes' said 'texas' and I couldn't figure out what the eff you were going on about. teach? Odd!

Jake Titus said...

Lifer: Yeah, and the joke is old. Enough already!

Ex: Taxes, Texas. . . Its all the same. Is it odd that I want to teach or do you think I'm odd in general?

Doug said...

I've been boycotting Wal-Mart for... oh, just about always. However, it wasn't so much that I objected to indirectly supporting China--I just didn't like the store.

But while we're on the subject: Having been to Beijing and Shanghai (four years ago), I can tell you that there are so many Western companies there that picking on Wal-Mart alone is (much as I hate to say it) kind of unfair.

But hey, temporarily extinguishing that torch... that's delightfully poetic (albeit impotent).

The Ex said...

Well, both.

about jenji said...

May I swear?

May I?

I assume you're nodding yes right now b/c let's face it, we have some sort of kindred connection for a good curse word, yeah?

Okay, so.

Yesterday, I "filled" up the tank for my travels...and by filled up I mean, I only had enough to pump 3 1/2 gallons of gas. I think it took all of 20 seconds to pump that amount. Ridiculous.

I mean, what am I supposed to do, start driving a go-cart for fuck's sake?

How am I supposed to get around with that amount of fuel?

I would ride my bike more, but I live on a friggin island, so that's simply not a realistic solution, as I'm at least 20 miles from all of my destinations.

So, once the weather warms up, which will be real, real soon if Bush/Cheney has anything to do with it, if you know what I'm sayin, I plan on loading my bike on the car rack and driving to my general destination, wherein I'll then ride wherever else I need to go from there.

I dunno, I'm looking around this country more and more lately and coming up with only one response: this place is a dump!

I hope you're doing well, jake!

Jake Titus said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jake Titus said...

Doug: Over the years I have made a great effort to avoid purchasing products made in China. But frankly, the glow in the dark titty lighters from Japan are way over priced and don't last nearly as long.

Ex: Thanks for your honesty...Wait, your right.... what the fuck am I thinking? :>)

Jenji: For fucks sake, swear often....please! The gas thing is killing us as well. We're a three car family! Teaching will be a way to earn some extra cash. Plus it might strengthen my frail ego.

Jeff said...

Great points, disturbing picture ;-)

I'm with you on all those topics - except I don't know anything about Chad Johnson. But I'm sure you make a good point about that too.

C said...

Talk about car horns! I had a neighbor that got hauled off in handcuffs but before that her ghettolicious friends would show up and honk their horn over and over. Holding the honk longer each time. I was ready to throw a couch at them.

Jake Titus said...

Jeff: Sometimes a disturbing picture is a good hook. Its kind of like watching a train want to look away but you just can't. BTW, the C Johnson

C: Couch chucking! I like you. I like you a lot.